Are you above the line or below the line?
At any given moment of your life you are either above the line, or below the line. Learning to locate yourself is the most powerful skill you can development to increase your well-being, regulate your nervous system, and live a bigger, fuller, more ALIVE life.
That’s a big claim. So what is this LINE I speak of? Well, I’m so glad you asked!
What does it mean?
I was first introduced to the concept by Jim Dethemer from the Conscious Leadership Group in a Neuroscience of Change training and it has truly changed my life. It was the opening that allowed me to start bringing awareness to what my nervous system is feeling, how I am reacting to a particular situation, and where those reactions are limiting the FULLNESS of my life experience.
Have a look at the pretty diagram I made for you below. ;) “The line” is the threshold between being in an “Open & Connected” state vs a “Closed & Protected” state. When we get triggered by something our nervous system interprets as “danger” we active our protection mode (fight/flight/freeze/collapse) as we dip (sometimes plummet!) below the line.
Our nervous systems are programmed to continuously scan the environment for any threat of safety or danger and either open to connection or close in protection accordingly. This includes not only physical threat, but most often, emotional threat or unpleasant feelings we want to avoid.
Above the Line
Above the line is where we feel safe, open, connected. It’s where our curiosity and creativity live, where we can dream big, connect deeply with others, play at the edge of our comfort zone, make bold moves, GROW and learn!
Below the Line
In our caveman days, danger looked like a saber-toothed tiger lurking outside the cave, but nowadays it is most often the threat of criticism, rejection, failure, or shame that trigger us into protection mode, taking us below the line.
Below the line we are all about protection. Connection becomes biologically difficult to impossible as we “flip our lid” and our pre-frontal cortex goes offline, we easily become the victim in our story, and we see the risk or fault all around us. As a result, we abort all missions and stay in the safety of our comfort zone, even if it doesn’t serve us. Sound familiar?
Put it into practice:
Think back to the last 24 hours. Try & remember a moment when you felt your nervous system shift into Fight or Flight or collapse into shutdown. Maybe you were late & hit some bad traffic? Or had a difficult conversation with a coworker? Or had plans change on you suddenly? Make a note of what triggers caused you to drop below the line & what happened for you.
Now think about how you recovered? Did you talk to someone about it? Listen to some music? Get outside? Go for a run? Pay attention to the recovery resources that bring you back into regulation.
Why is this important?
Leading from Above the Line
As I outlined in this previous post, in order to design a life that truly lights you up, you need access to your creativity, courage, curiosity, connection and self-awareness. Those things live above the line.
For those of you leading teams or organizations, learning how to locate yourself & build resilience to recover to a space above the line when you dip (& we ALL dip) is even more crucial because your energy is contagious. If you are leading from below the line your vision is narrow and you are making fear based decisions which stifle creativity, trust and innovation. Check out this video for more on Leadership & Locating Yourself.
Your health depends on it
Below the line, the parts of our nervous system that take care of everyday respiratory and gut health get hijacked into survival modes of fight/flight or freeze/collapse. This means they aren’t able to do their “day job” and we start to suffer from inflammatory and other health issues when we get stuck below the line for sustained periods.
I experienced this first hand when I was hospitalized for stress induced ulcers, and later diagnosed as Crohn’s disease, after spending YEARS below the line. I wish I could reach back in time and support my former self with awarness-building tools like this one and avoid a lot of suffering.
“Am I above or below the line?” has now become a tool I use daily and with all of my clients. It's a simple and powerful self-awareness tool, and quickly becomes second nature with a little practice. You’ll soon notice that you will catch yourself sooner, have less intense reactions and recover more quickly by using the this simple practice.
Here’s how it works
Several times a day check in with yourself and ask “Am I above or below the line right now?”
Then ask “How do I know?” Take a breath and see if you can name the emotion you are feeling - use the Feelings Wheel to get as granular as possible. (eg. annoyed vs angry)
Next, ask “Where do I feel it?” Tune into your body and see if you can find the place that emotion is felt most strongly. Look for any tension, or sensation, perhaps it has a temperature or movement to it. (eg. tightness in my chest or throat or a hot tingling sensation in my hands)
This is called Notice & Name - you notice what’s going on and then name it “Wow, I’m really below the line right now. I feel embarrassed and I feel it in a tingling sensation in my hands”. Great!
Lastly ask “What do I need right now?”. Listen for the answer, try not to over think it. It could be you need to disengage from this situation by stepping back, taking a break, or you need a snack, a rest, a walk, or to have a good cry?
That’s it. The first and most powerful step in increasing your leadership capacity so that you can live a FULLER life.
If you don’t know where you are, then you can’t map the path to where you want to go!